Finally...

Okay. I am finally returning to the 30 Things questions and with a quick peek back at the original blog post... we are on number 24 (almost wrote "numero" for some reason...) which reads like this:

Describe your family dynamic of your childhood versus your family dynamic now. 

This is a rather strange one in my opinion seeing as I don't consciously think about what my family dynamic is on a regular basis. 

But I suppose thinking about my childhood days, I was more likely to communicate clearly with my parents rather than my siblings. Of course, my clarity is rather relative for, to be honest, no one would be aware I was stressed about this thing or another until it was "too late" and I had a mental break down. However, when I needed advice I would, nine times out of ten, go directly to Mom. If I needed comforting without words I would go to Dad. If I wanted to be a pest, I would seek out my siblings--most often my older brother. 
I am sure that my dynamic with Jerry was probably one of the most confusing, bi-polar relationships this world has ever seen. (Okay... maybe I exaggerate but moving on...) During the day, we were often mortal enemies, both the antagonist and protagonist in our turns. Cats vs dogs. Utah vs BYU. Sweet vs Sour! Maybe not that last one... but you get the picture right? Very square peg, very round hole as it were. 
However, the moment you would turn off the lights I would often go and sleep on the floor in his room or, in later years, switch beds with Tommy and we would talk and talk and talk... we would talk, I suppose, very much like we did when we were young and sleeping in a bunk bed, Mikkaila just born and Tommy on the way. I don't know when it changed to a moonlight serenade, but it did and we were very akin to crickets and cicadas. I remember we would rationalize that if we stayed up until midnight on a Sunday then it would be Monday morning... in other words, it would be okay to play the Nintendo (or whatever version thereof that we had at that time). 
Christmas Eve, we would often gather all 5 of us together into one room (something which we did almost three years ago now, this time joined by Sarah, my sister-in-law) and sleep. In the wee hours of the morning, after Santa had come of course, Jerry would be the first to wake and sneak to the stockings and he would inevitably wake me up so I could share his joy of the loot and encourage me to also look through my stocking. 
Now, although we do not talk often, we talk about important things and calmly so... unless he cannot stand it any longer and throws a jab my way that I parry... like we did when we were teenagers but thankfully it doesn't seem to get as full blown now as it did then. Weird what growing up will do to you.

My three younger siblings in my earlier days were often cute to me but usually just a nuisance. I am sure I felt they were some type of squatter, coming in to steal my land. It is rather interesting to think of now because now there is nothing I would like better than to be in the same house (or, less drastic measures, the same town) as them so I could watch them grow up and mature. 
We definitely get cuddlier as we grow older (although Tommy hasn't changed much at all in that regard... we're simply finally catching up with his loving nature and Mikkaila seems to be clinging to the standoff-ish but soon... very soon). I love when I go home and there is a race to see who can hug me first. But I daresay, Alex hugs me the most when I am home, often just sitting beside me with her arms about me (and of course I reciprocate or that would be just unnecessarily mean and awkward...) and I am thankful for it. 

As a whole, I was close to my family then and I am close to my family now. The dynamic and direction of the closeness may have changed over the years (especially now that I am not physically close to them although my physical appearance continues to be) but it will forever be true, I believe, that we are close and love one another very much... even if we don't communicate it well or as clearly or properly as we would like. 

Now that I have written a lengthy description as per the question's wishes, I see what an interesting query this is. I would love to see it from the perception of my parents or even any of my siblings (for some reason, especially Alex... maybe because I'm toward the top of the "food chain" whilst she sits at the bottom).

Lastly... I realize that my dynamic as a big sister hasn't really ever changed. I'm sure in some things I am still looked to as an example (whether that be good or bad is probably varied) but I will always be Mom and Dad's first baby girl. And you know what? I am okay with that.