Austen and Accomplishments

"What is right to be done cannot be done too soon." -Jane Austen

I was looking for a specific quote by Miss Austen to use for this blog and stumbled upon two quotes that address the subjects that have most heavily weighed on my mind these past 24-48 hours rather than the end subject of accomplishments that I intend to talk about. 
How many times do we agonize over timing? I don't know about you, but I feel that timing is everything (just like it says in the country song). I always worry that I will confess my heart too soon to be counted as sensible and true but I also worry that if I don't tell them when I have finally decided upon telling them that I will in fact never tell them and be left with all the "what ifs" that the world has to supply a single woman of small fortune. 
This is quite likely what causes my heart to resound to Miss Austen's words about right things and simply doing them. I really do feel that if something is right then I ought to do it as it comes to my mind and becomes a viable course of action. 
Therefore, all day I was wondering how I was to tell this boy (for of course it would be a boy in my case) about my affections toward him. You know those people that you just feel good around? The ones that make you feel happy and like you want to be a better person? I seem to stumble upon quite a few of those. As I was writing, I decided that I must tell him and now especially with circumstances being what they are in my life currently. 
I even attended the temple today in hopes of a little extra support. Well, I received the support I needed and found a moment when I could finally speak with him. After a few moments of gathering my wits about me I finally said it. Those three little words: I like you. Why are those three words, three syllables, so darn hard to say? I cannot fathom the reason thus I will move on.
Longer story short, we came to the conclusion that we were to stay simply friends. And I truly am thankful that we were friends to start with or else this probably would have been a lot more painful. To be sure, it sucks being turned down again and then encouraged to pursue another boy that is semi- in the light, but at least we have gotten over that "rock" as another dear friend of mine referred to it as. 
To the next quote I found, which actually comes perfectly into this scene: "In nine cases out of ten, a woman had better show more affection than she feels." Again, this is from Jane Austen's pen. I feel more often than not, I am in the case of 1. To show more affection than I feel is a lie in a my mind and thus I don't like to do it. I mean there are times when it's down right demanded that I show more affection-- particularly to those people I flat out dislike-- and although I dislike being friendly with them I do so out of a sense of duty or propriety. 
However in the matters of my heart toward the men I have met, I do try to show just as much affection as I have for them (or somehow express how very little I have for them). If I feel for a man they will know it if they simply open their eyes and pay attention. But if I feel uncomfortable about furthering something, I won't respond to the affections that they pay me. I hate to lead anyone on and if I accept their affections without conveying to them clearly and concisely that they won't receive the same level of affection from me then that would be a lie of the most heinous sort.
Who knows? Maybe I will end up alone this way but at least I won't end up with someone I don't truly and thoroughly love. Sure, they may have their quirks. I can get over quirks. But if I simply don't feel affection toward them then it doesn't matter how many good qualities they have. I simply won't pursue it.

Now, to completely switch gears...!
You might ask, "Cassidy, what are 5 of your greatest accomplishments?"

Well I guess (and these are in no particular order)...

1.  Miss Corning 2009. Yes. I was in a scholarship program (coughpageantcough) and I won it somehow. But I am glad I did for the experience of being a princess in the eyes of a whole town full of little girls for a year is quite unlike any other. Furthermore, the chance I had to mingle with the older folks of Corning will always have a soft spot in my heart.

2. My first job outside of Les Schwab. I worked at the Hunger Stop after avidly pursuing it for a good month or two and how rewarding it was! Being able to work the morning shifts, I got to experience the pleasure of getting to be really acquainted with the regulars that would come in for breakfast every work day. Hearing their stories and winning their regard and love was something wonderful and new. And I realized how charming I could be and how much information I can hold in this head of mine. Memorizing the orders of the walk-ins and the drive-thrus even if they only came through once a week...? Yes. It was awesome.

3. My first relationship. Odd one you might say but I find great accomplishment in the fact that it was healthy and although it came to an end, I can still call him "friend" and still love to talk with him any chance we get. 

4. I can cook. Who knew that actually pulling up a recipe and following it would produce good results? I haven't died yet from my cooking and have even had a few people compliment me on it. Yay me. Haha!

5. I have read the Lord of the Rings Trilogy, three times through. Yes. I consider that an accomplishment. So take that.

And I am out until next time when I address what I wish I was great at. There are a few of those....